Dear pupils! In order to make you understand the difference between a high level critique and a low level one, I'll read to you two texts written 1800 years ago about an autodidact artist nicknamed Anamateur. He was a B-class jazz artist who claimed that the musicals he wrote concerned the world, whereas they were just cheap recordings of his vulgar obsessions. The first critique is by director Avo Goulikez, a demagogue (2012): “Though the phrase “an amateur” can be used vulgarly in our times as a depreciating title, not being far of constituting a synonymous for “a charlatan”, it seems that mr. Georgios T. Anamateros, or just Anamateur, is aware of some Latin etymology... For he is undoubtedly a man with an enthusiastic amor for his art and as such, he remains unaffected by the intimidation of the academic milieux and unimpressed by the whims of the market. Anamateur’s need to create art is deeply primordial: his every-day life in crisis-tormented Greece obliges him to escape, creating a magnificent world apart... The result may lack of a certain professional quality, but if he continues to be embraced by gifted Pros, we will surely hear about him more in the future.” Please don't vomit on your benches: here comes the second critique, the good one. It is by Eva Fenia Xynomythrikaki, a venerated connaisseur (2010): "Excuse me once more of being so repetitive about it, but it is surely naive (if not ridiculous) to believe that in our times of advanced musical accomplishments, any serious contribution can be made in jazz by an amateur. Yesterday's concert in our finest jazz bar was lamentable. Just lamentable! And I wonder: isn’t mr. Anamateur aware that the art he chose to ridiculize is so demanding? How does he dare to call himself a “jazz entertainer”? Jazz is nowadays a serious and complicated form of art, for the mastering of which a student has to spend years of apprentissage in musical academies! No, I don't sound too cruel: Anamateros’ singing and piano playing were really so simplistic, his performance so grottesque... Even his songs are Fats Waller imitations basically... What a bad JAM session! Poor Pros, I won't even name you here, in order not to embarass you more. Mr. Anamateur, you’re just an engineer; do us a favour and disappear!" Dear pupils I would like to add to that (and please have this phrase in mind when writing a critique): "Narcissism can't produce any form of art. Sorry Anamateur, you're not an auteur!"

Jamie Lafayette the 2nd, writing for